My teary eyes I wipe still I weep
In my arms dearest you are lost
With all my endeavors at high cost
This feeling I shield and keep
Shall never be freed or unleashed
Try not to express my sorrow tomorrow
Others will look at you with such insanity
Yet I don't care! I swear, they may tear and tear
But I am in such great despair to care
So they can have their share of tear.
Does that make me unmanly amongst my family?
O' My!
You should see how much stress that I try to digress
But the stress, I cannot confess!
Thus, I weep myself to sleep.
Great poem and good rhyme. But the only line that is tricky is "But the stress, I cannot confess!" Pretty much, throughout the poem the narrator is confessing that he/she has lost someone and is feeling the hurt. So, its basically "confessing" to the reader. You can keep the line, but just think it over.
ReplyDeleteYea, I did it on purpose bc im pouring out all my emotions. I would not think anyone would realize that since it is so obvious. Thanks for the comment =]
ReplyDeleteThe whole NaNoWrMo is a contest. Its worldwide, so there's going to be some tough competition. It's also for fun, since I love to write and all.
ReplyDeleteI forgot to tell you to google it. A lot of people have/should have heard of it.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis is a dope poem.
ReplyDeleteyeah, im trying new styles of writing. Most of my writing is about joyous experiences in life, but i was trying to express sorrowful experiences. thats what mike wants us to do.
ReplyDeleteI personally found this poem a bit too sweet, but I do apperciate the effort you put into it.
ReplyDeleteKeep experimenting with different styles.
+3