With a ruler.
Why do blondes always smile during lightning storms?
They think their picture is being taken.
What would you do if a blonde threw a hand grenade right at you?
You'd pull the pin and throw it back.
Yo Mama is so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat people yell "Taxi!"
Yo Mama is so fat that she fell in love and broke it.
Yo Mama is so fat that she has more Chin's than a Chinese phone book.
Yo Mama is so fat that she is on both sides of the family.
Yo Mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.
Yo Mama is so stupid that she bought a solar powered flashlight.
Yo Mama is so stupid that she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
"It's going to take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by a chick"
The doctor says to a man. I got bad news and worse news. The man says, "Whats the man news?"The docter says "You only have 24 hrs to live." He says "What's the worse news?" The doctor replies, "I forgot to call you yesterday."
This guy goes hunting with his friend and tells his friend, "O My Lord I can see your house from here and your wife is cheating on you with another man." He says "I have had it with her. Shoot him in the head and shoot him in the private parts." He said, "I'll get that in one shot!"
Are these your own or did you swipe them???
ReplyDeletemost of them I heard from word of mouth and decided to write them down. I did not copy and paste them right off the internet b/c that would be plagiarism.
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